Mother's Day

     Every year on Mother's Day, I look forward to what my kids have made for me at school.  I always hope that they had some kind of survey to fill out because those are the best.  This year, my kids came through and gave me what I was hoping for. 

     Maddie handed me her card first:

"My mother is 25 years old." 

 That was at the top of the list.  Man, she's good.  I thought that she was just trying to be nice, but she said that she honestly thought that I was 25 and then was a little embarrassed that she didn't know how old her own mother is.  I told her that 25 is a great age, and she can keep thinking that I'm that old as long as she wants to.  I'll even be 25 next year, and the year after that!  

"My mother's favorite food is cauliflower."  I think I might cook this stuff a little too much.  It's not really my favorite food, but it's pretty good.  

Here's another one that I really liked:  "My mother's favorite place to go is Target."  I don't know many people who don't like Target.  It's not my favorite place to go, and I can certainly think of several other places that I'd rather be at, but I don't dislike going there.    

     Reese handed me his card.  "Dear Mom, I hope you have a good Mother's Day and I'll try to be good."  Hey, at least he was honest.  He didn't promise that he was going to be good, he just said that he would try.  

     Saying that I was pleasantly surprised as he handed me a packet would be an understatement.  I held that thing in my hands as I looked at the drawing of myself on the cover right above the title, "My Mom" and thought, "Oh s#!t, what did he say in here?"  Some of you know Reese on a personal level, and don't tell me that you wouldn't be thinking the same thing.  

     





     One of his favorite things to do is have a camp out in the loft together and watch movies.  That's what this picture is.  It's him and I with the girls (minus Ian because I guess he's too big to have a camp out with his mom).  

     
     




     I wasn't exactly sure what he was doing in this picture: "Look at Me Doing that Thing You Love!"  He said that he was picking up the house.  You bet your sweet ass that's the thing that I love!  This kid knows me well.    

     According to Reese, enchiladas are my favorite food.  They're really not, but I still like them anyway  as long as they're good.  My favorite thing to do is "play on her iphone."  Hmph.  

     Remember my post from the other day when I was talking about picking them up from school and Reese usually has something funny to say when he gets in the car?  That's what the next picture is about.  I'm sitting in the car and it says, "If I want to make my mom laugh, I tell her stuff."  That usually does it.  Even when he's not trying to be funny, he's funny.  

     The very last picture, though, tells the absolute truth:  "Her favorite place to go is home."  There's nowhere I'd rather be.  

     Happy Mother's Day to all of the moms, grandmothers, step-moms, and mother figures...and to all of the dads who are both mom and dad to their little ones.    

Don't Ask Questions

     I'm sure that many of you like to know what kind of day your kids had at school.  I know that I do.  However, every day as they pile into the car, I'm shut down each time as I ask each of them, "How was your day?"

     Okay.  I'll be honest.  I don't just ask that one question.  It's  more like, "How was your day?  Was it good?  What did you do?  What did you learn?  Who did you hang out with?"  They usually respond with something similar to, "Fine.  My day was fine", and answer the rest of the questions with a sigh and an eye roll and that's the end of that conversation.  I didn't think that this would have started until they were in high school, or at least jr. high, but apparently I was wrong.

     It doesn't stop me from asking anyway.  Usually, Reese is the first one to the car.  Yesterday, he gets in and, well, those of you who know Reese shouldn't be too surprised at how the conversation unfolded:

Me:  Hey!  (noticing that he wasn't wearing his sweater).  Where's your sweater?

Reese:  It's in my backpack.  I don't need it.

Me:  It's windy and cold.

Reese:  Well, that's YOUR opinion.  

Dude.  It's 60° outside.  It's also windy.  It's cold to ME.  As much as I don't want to admit it, he's right.  

Me:  How was school, or do you not want me asking you that?

Reese:  I don't like it when people ask me a lot of questions.

Me:  Why?

Reese:  Because it's annoying and the conversation gets out of hand.

     Once again, he's right, because it does get out of hand.  It starts out with me just asking simple questions, then escalates into a discussion about why none of them want to answer anything else I have to ask.  I think I might be asking too many.  I certainly didn't expect this from my 10, 9, & 5 year old children, yet here I am.  I guess I'm that mom. 

     Does this get better, or is it a situation that's going to get worse before it starts to improve?  It appears that the only one who tolerates me is the little one.  She will chatter away to me all day long and is happy doing it.  

     So, I have two choices:  1: Keep asking questions anyway.  2:  Don't ask, thus possibly making myself appear like I don't care.  I could always wait until they say something to me first.  Most of the time though, that "first" thing I hear is a smart ass comment from Reese (and from what I understand, is a favorite among Reese fans).  

     I guess my lesson is:  Don't ask so many questions, mom.     

      

An Interview with Maddie

Well, it's time again for a birthday interview.  Here is the post that I began writing on Maddie's birthday:

I was trying to convince Maddie to get dressed this morning.  It was difficult to get her out of the new pajamas that I just bought for her because she was enjoying wearing them.  They came with a matching nightgown for her doll. 

Holding up an orange dress from inside of her closet, I asked her, "Do you want to wear this dress today?"  She replied with, "No, I want to wear the new dress that you just bought for me."  Confused, I asked her, "What new dress?  I didn't buy you a dress."  "The orange one, mom.  Remember we got it the other day."  

The conversation escalated, and so did her frustration with each answer that she gave to me:

"Maddie, that wasn't a dress that I bought you.  That is a tank top.  We had this conversation already."  I grabbed the new shirt in my hand and compared it to the dress that I had in the other.  "See, the dress is longer".  

"Then that's a dress for little babies,"  she says.  "It's too short for me."

Hmmm... then I thought of something that would most certainly end this conversation.  It's her birthday today and she is 4.  The shirt is also size 4.  Oh yes, this is going to work:

"Maddie, do you see what the tag says?  What size is this?"

"4."

"Ok, and how old are you?"

Knowing that she had lost this argument, she looks at me with a furrowed brow as she's trying with all of her might not to laugh, she says, "I'm 16!"

Sigh.  You certainly act like it.  It occurred to me that she didn't get her birthday interview yet.  So, here it is.  A peek inside of the mind of my daughter.  

  How old are you today?

  4

   What is the best thing that happened to you so   far this year? 

   We went to Sea World.

   What was your favorite part about sea world?

    I got to see Shamu.

    Is it a girl or a boy?

    I think it’s a girl.  She’s so pretty.

   What is your favorite book?

    Don’t Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late

    What do you like about it?

    When the pigeon says, “I’m not tired!!”

     Do you know what you want to be when you grow up?

     Rapunzel.

     How can you be Rapunzel when you grow up? 

     You have to have long hair.

 

     What is your favorite toy?

     Whack-a-mole.

     What is your favorite outfit to wear?

      My Rapunzel dress.

      What is your favorite color?

      Pink

      Do you think that you will get married someday?

      No.

      Why not? 

      Because daddy’s going to be mad.

      If you could decorate our house, what would it look like?

      It would have pink and purple streamers.

      If you could have any pet, what would it be?

      A koala. Oh, and a flamingo.

  

What is your favorite movie?

Rapunzel.

What is the grossest thing that you can think of?

Poop.

Are you starting school soon? 

Yes, preschool.

What do you think it will be like?

 I will play outside on the playground and do some work.

What is your favorite food?

Strawberries.

What do you think of my driving?

You’re a cool driver.

(sweet)

What do you think about being 4?

It’s awesome. I like being 4 and pretty.

Do you feel any different?

Yeah.

What is something that I always say to you?

That you love me.

How do I make you laugh?

 Tickle my belly.

How old do you think I am?

16

(smart girl)

How old is daddy?

 Maybe 16.

Who is the nicest person that you know?

Me (with a big smile).

What are you really good at? 

Playing Candyland.

What are you not so good at?

Whack-a-mole.  It called me a “bowl head” and that’s not nice.

What is the best thing about having brothers? 

They’re fun.

What don’t you like about having brothers?

 They’re rude.

What is something that your brothers do that makes you mad? 

They make me cry.

How do they make you cry? 

They annoy me.

What is your favorite thing about having a sister? 

Playing with her.  She’s my best friend.

How are you and Keira different?

 I’m brown and she’s white.

You mean your hair? 

No, I mean my whole self.  See, (pointing to her skin) this is brown.

What don’t you like about having a sister? 

When she’s rude.

What is something that Keira does that makes you mad? 

She laughs at me when I pee myself.

If you had a lot of money, what do you think you would buy?

A bunch of strawberries.

What is your favorite thing to do with mommy? 

Go to the mall.

What is your favorite thing to do with daddy? 

I like to help daddy outside.

What does 'love' mean?

It means I love you.

Are there any questions that I didn’t ask you? 

Yes.  You didn’t ask me what makes me giggle and swiggle.

I’m sorry, what makes you giggle? 

And swiggle.

What is a swiggle? 

A swiggle is something that makes you laugh.  That’s what I’m talking about.

What makes you giggle and swiggle? 

A tickle.

Is there anything else that you feel that I need to know? 

No, we’re done.

Happy Birthday, Reese!

For Reese's birthday, I thought I would sit down with him and talk a little bit about how he feels now that he's a year older.

Happy Birthday, Reese.

Thank you.

How old are you today?

6.

How does it feel to be 6?

(shrugs shoulders)

How was your day?
Good.

What did you do today?
Ate lunch, went to church, ate cake.

What did you learn at church today?
I don't know.  I made a fish.

What was the weather like?
Rainy and cold.

What do you think is the most important thing that you've learned about life so far?
That you have to poop in the toilet.

How do you think you're different from one year ago?
I'm 6.

What's your favorite thing about yourself?
I think I'm funny.

You've been in kindergarten for 100 days now.  What do you like about it so far?
Recess.

What is one thing that your teacher always says?
Listen, follow directions.

What do you think she does when she's not at school?
 I don't know but she doesn't have a wii.

What is your favorite part of your playground at school.
The slide and the umbrella.

What do you like learning about?
Math.

Is there anything that you would do to enhance your educational experience?
(laughs) No, I don't know.

Tell me about our family.
There are 6 people.

What do you like about having a big brother?
He plays the wii with me.

What do you like about having two little sisters?
They're cute.

What is your weirdest relative like?
Daddy.  He's always playing the playstation and he changes commercials.

If you could take a vacation anywhere in the world, where would you want to go?
To the forest.  No, wait, not the forest.  Disneyland or Disney World, which one is bigger?

Disney World is bigger.
 Is there a lot of ponds?

I don't know.
In the past year, what have been some of your favorite books, movies, and music? 
The Darth Vader theme song. If You Give a Pig a Pancake. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.  

What is your favorite tv show?
The Mr. Men Show.

If a canoe was flying over your house with four flat tires, how many pancakes would it take to cover a doghouse?
100?

Do you know how to drive a car?
No.

Why do you think the sky is blue?
Because it just is.

What do you think the tooth fairy does with the teeth when she takes them?
My tooth fairy is a boy.

Ok, what do you think HE does with them?
I don't know, makes teeth for old people.  Nah Nah has teeth that she can take out.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
A cop.

Why?
Because I want to catch bad guys.

Do you think you will ever get married?
I don't know, yes.

How old do you think you will be when you get married?
16?

What have you learned about girls since you started kindergarten?
Nothing.

You know guys don't ever learn anything about girls, right?
 Huh?

What's your favorite candy?
Reese's.

What's your favorite animal?
Penguins.

Anything you're scared of?
The dark.

Anything else that you would like to say?
I don't know.  Can I go now?


Yes, you can go.  Thank you, Reese.